5 Reasons to Accept What Is
5 Reasons to Accept What Is
Every day around the world millions of people wake up and think to themselves is this it? Is this all we get? And, before I say another word, I think it’s important that we realize that we all feel this way. We are not alone. We find ourselves, in a way, ‘stuck’ with these lives that we live. Not knowing which way to go, why we are here or what the point is. It’s all a bit of a shock to the system and it can take us a lifetime to come to terms with it. To be able to live happily we need to learn to accept what is. Better still, learn to love what is instead of asking ourselves is this as good as it gets. We need to make it as good as it can get instead.
Learning to accept what is doesn’t come easily though. We feel like we have no control over our own lives. We feel shoved into life, then into a role, a job etc. Life causes us to feel like we need to follow a path outlined for us to a predetermined destination. That uncertainty leaves us feeling that we lack control over our own lives. There are too many unknowns and understandably we struggle with this. We have what we would call a bad day and we think to ourselves ‘is this my life?’. But a bad moment or a bad day does not sum up a life. That experience does not define who you are. Learning to accept what is means looking at the whole picture instead of focusing on what you cannot control. And, more importantly, realizing what you can control such as your reactions.
What if we change the tone when we say this very same sentence. Instead, we can put the emphasis on this. What if this is all there is? Picture yourself, arms wide open, heart wide open, embracing, all that this is. What if we choose to see it as a celebration? What if all it takes is a shift in mindset, a shift in perspective, to understand the blessing of the moment and to be open and appreciative to the blessings of this life. Maybe even ask a different question. What can I create from this?
Reasons to Accept What Is
1. What Cannot be Changed
I have always loved the serenity prayer:
‘God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.’
There is so much wisdom in these words. We focus on the wrong things! We are so concerned with what we cannot change, or control, that we miss out on what is absolutely within our control. While we worry about what happened yesterday or plan for (and worry about) tomorrow, we miss out on the beauty of today.
Yesterday does not exist beyond the memory of it. Tomorrow does not exist beyond the dream of it. Today is all there is. This realisation can be quite in your face. A shock to the system, but if we get past that and we get down to the message behind it, all we really have to do is to understand that we need to focus on the now. This moment right now is all we have. If we spend it asking ourselves questions like ‘is this all there is?’, are we truly making the most of this life? Learn to accept what is by becoming fully tuned in to your life as it is.
2. Gratitude like Pixie Dust
When we accept what is we open our hearts to gratitude. Gratitude is like magic pixie dust, sprinkled all around. It adds a touch of magic to our experience of life. It makes those without wings able to fly. Living a life filled with gratitude means appreciating everything that you have. And when you take the time to appreciate your life you are flicking a switch. Turning on the light to allow you to see but also turning on a light of love within you. Gratitude is love, in a nutshell. And the moment you look lovingly on your life that you, moments before, were seeing from a place of lack you instantly become overwhelmed with feelings of abundance and gratitude.
This is the power of gratitude. The next time you wonder to yourself ‘is this it?’, try using gratitude as a tool to help you accept what is. We all have something (scratch that. Many things.) to be grateful for in this life. You only need to stop focusing on where you are lacking for long enough to begin a list of things to be grateful for. When you get to 10 you will begin to understand what I mean. This is the beauty of the true simplicity behind the feeling of gratitude. It’s seemingly obvious, yet we need to be reminded. We need to be pulled out of the darkness and back into the light of love and joy.
3. Release Resistance
Accepting what is means releasing resistance. When we do this life can flow much more easily for us. We need to learn to stop pushing against life. We need to learn to stop pushing against ourselves. Most of the pressure we experience in life is self-inflicted. When we lighten up and take time to experience life from a calmer, more intuitive place we are able to be more, perform more, give more.
Releasing resistance means releasing expectation. It means allowing yourself to be in flow with life. So much of why we ask ‘is this it?’ is because we are weighed down by expectation. Let is go! Just be. Be who you are, show up for yourself in a way that feels natural to you and allow yourself to enjoy life instead of wondering why it never seems to be enough.
4. Let It Be Enough
This life, this moment, really is all there is so let it be enough. Although it might be difficult to hear this right here really is all that we have so we need to learn to embrace it. If you feel it is not enough it is only in your perception that this is the truth. If you learn to love the moment, your circumstances, yourself, it really is enough.
It is only ever ‘not enough’ when we don’t accept it for what it is. Whether it is a job, a relationship or an age bracket, if we are questioning if it is enough, we are the ones questioning its worthiness. Choose to see that value instead. This may come in the form of a lesson of some sort but look closely at any situation and you can find value in it. If you hate your job the question ‘is this it?’ is extremely valid but instead of focusing on the ‘stuckness’ use it to figure out your next step towards a life that has no space for a question like that. To accept what is doesn’t mean to settle! Absolutely not! In a situation like this it means to accept the opportunity for growth. The opportunity to learn what drives you, lights you up and gives you purpose.
5. Stop Stealing the Joy of Now
Every moment spent focused on yesterday or tomorrow takes away from the experience of today. Instead of thinking is ‘this all there is’ look at the moment, the day, the week, the month and ask yourself how can I make this all it should be? Change it to how can I celebrate this life? How can I reach my full potential? Or, how can I use this day as an opportunity?
We walk around like the life we’ve been given is a weight that we carry on our shoulders. Not only is this tragic, but the weights are placed there by ourselves, not by anybody else. Ultimately, we are the ones who must choose to lift the weight by choosing to accept what is. Reframe your perspective and see the power that you have to change your view on your life, and your experience of it!
Thank you for reading, I hope you found it helpful!
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