Allowing Yourself to Grow
Allowing Yourself to Grow
My personal growth has meant learning to stop playing it small. That means learning to put myself out into the world, to stop holding myself back. But my wings are not capable yet, they are still growing. Sometimes it feels like an unscalable mountain. But, there is no starting line and finishing line for Personal Growth, is there? And each new hurdle comes with challenges and risks that stir up fears.
How do you Tell Someone that Fear Evaporates After you’ve Pushed Yourself?
Advice is wonderful, but 90% of the time it falls on deaf ears. When you are under the influence of fear you store those pieces of advice for another, stronger day. On those days you re-call them and use them as your fuel. When you are at your most vulnerable, though, you hear only your fears.
My wings are still growing. Each day is new growth. A new feather, a new skill, a new growing pain. Allowing yourself to grow comes with growing pains, it can’t be avoided. It can make you feel raw and exposed, but growth cannot begin unless you are brave and take chances. It isn’t easy. But, we cannot grow if we stay in one place, we must keep pushing forward.
Finding your Strengths
Working through my personal growth story has led me to (or back to) writing. I asked myself the question, why do I write? What is it inside me that draws me to this method of self-expression? There’s something so beautiful and powerful about writing words down, something that expresses my deepest sense of self in a better way than I am capable of expressing in a normal conversation. Sometimes it doesn’t even feel like me that is writing. Sometimes it feels like the words are channelled from a higher place. This begs the question, is that higher place my true self? What do we really understand about our true selves?
If you’ve ever written in what is referred to as ‘the flow’ then you understand what I’m referring to. There is something that happens when you write in the flow that is beyond explanation. It is the reason why I advocate journaling. It is a connection to your inner being unlike anything I’ve experienced before. When you begin to write and trust the process and you don’t overthink it, the words flow so freely that it can only be honest and true and genuine. This means they come from the purist part of who you are. So often in this day and age, we lose the ability to trust in our own intuition and guidance. Tapping into our intuition through journaling has been one of the most powerful processes in my life. It has helped me to uncover my true emotions, clear away my doubts, and refine my goals.
Using your Strengths to Keep Growing
So, those wings. When you find your strengths, and you begin allowing yourself to grow, your wings begin to grow. It take practice, dedication, struggle and tears, but slowly they begin to grow. What I have come to realize is that without your strengths your growth will be stunted. In simpler terms, find the strengths you were naturally gifted in this lifetime. When you stop denying your true essence a happy side effect is that you allow yourself to grow.
Someone who loves playing piano but hasn’t played in 15yrs, someone who wants to work with animals but spends all day in an office, someone who loves cutting hair and instead sells shoes. When you step into what you love you thrive, you find your truth. When you realize that living from this place of joy is the only way to live you will do anything to turn this into your reality.
Make your Own Opportunities
We are led to believe that artists don’t make a good living, most actors fail, being a Doctor is better than being a hairdresser etc etc. But, there are people doing every imaginable job successfully as we speak. There are also people who are content with a simple life as long as they are doing what they love! At the end of the day, happiness will always outweigh money. Find what makes you happy.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with having the drive to be successful. But, always start from a place of joy. Seeking financial success comes with a bucket load of reasons for wanting that success. Seeking to expand your reach in a particular field, to help more people, and therefore becoming financially successful; that will bring you joy and many other people joy too. This is the kind of success we should all be striving for, not feeling guilty about wanting!
Take the Plunge
How does the baby bird learn to fly? He gets pushed out of the bloody nest, that’s how! Baby humans have hands reaching out in case their baby’s fat little bum lands on the floor 2ft away! We are so protected by everything. Be brave enough to jump, it’s the only way to test your wings.
Overthinking is like getting stuck in quicksand. If you think about it too much you might not do it, so don’t overthink it! This is where learning to trust your intuition comes in. Respond to those twinges, the gut instinct. When you let your overactive imagination take over it will can end up talking you out of something your first instinct was right about.
Learn from Your Mistakes
We never get things right the ‘1st time’. Mistakes (and disappointments) are part of the growth. Sometimes they make us want to give up. We feel misunderstood and alone. We feel like a failure. But, how do we learn without making mistakes? You know that feeling, when you’re the new guy at work and you feel like such a fool for making that silly mistake? We are all ‘the new guy’ at some point. Don’t be harsh with yourself, you wouldn’t be harsh with ‘the new guy’!
This is all about understanding that mistakes don’t equal failure but instead signify growth. You learn very quickly if you made a mistake that affected your bottom line, don’t you?! See the opportunity for growth in your mistakes, allowing yourself to grow in these moments will set you up for success.
Understand that growth is ongoing. This is the best realization you will ever have because it means you can only get better and better! It seems so obvious but when I really processed this in relation to myself and realized I had placed limitations on myself it’s a game changer. Understand that every limitation you place on yourself can be overcome with constant forward motion. Allowing yourself to grow into the best possible version of yourself!
Anything that you feel is holding you back can be overcome if you keep expanding yourself. Lacking confidence? Confidence can be taught. Fear, Self Image, Self Worth. Whether you’re looking to overcome or improve on something, it can be done! Most of us just don’t believe we can and that is why we don’t. Recognize that all it takes is a conscious decision to allow yourself to grow instead of limiting yourself. Then, find the tools you need to change your reality!
Let me share some of my favourite Personal Growth resources with you!
Here’s a list of Recommended Courses in Personal Growth
Gaia – Spiritual Shows and Meditation
Looking for similar blogs? Check out A Sense of Knowing
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I know life will throw you some curved balls, but I have learned that they do grow your wings. Loved this blog. Thanks!! S
Thank you! I know it really doesn’t feel like it at the time, but if we keep working through it we will come out stronger 🙂
I loved this blog. I agree that journaling has a lot of benefits especially refining your goals. Another important thing i got from this is that we have to get out of our comfort zone in order to grow.
Yes, this is a difficult but essential part, absolutely!
This post contains such an important point, the importance of accepting and embracing the change we go through.
Thanks for reading, Gabriella. We have to embrace the change or we will feel like we’re swimming upstream constantly 🙂
“When you step into what you love you thrive, you find your truth.”
Yes, until we understand this we will keep pushing against what life throws at us!
This was such an inciteful, relatable article. I’ve also had times when it didn’t feel like it was me writing. Especially during my poetry and fiction-writing phases. It’s such a surreal experience. I did feel connected to my higher self.
Thanks for reading, George, and thanks for sharing about your experience with writing! I would love for more people to experience the way writing magically connects you to yourself 🙂