Go On and Believe In Yourself!
It feels so good when we have friends and family who believe in us. But, there is nothing better than when you believe in yourself. Nothing better than the way it feels and nothing better than the way it empowers you to reach for more! Believing in yourself is like the wind beneath your wings, pushing you to step into the highest and best version of yourself. Yes, we can achieve a lot from feeling like those around us believe in us, but when we believe in ourselves the sky really is the limit.
Take a moment to imagine a life where you believe in yourself, no matter what anyone else says or does. What would change for you, and what could you achieve? What does it take for us to believe in ourselves? We are constantly seeking approval, but whos seal of approval do we need in order for us to be happy? I believe we are actually seeking our own approval deep down. So, let’s look at why that is, why on earth we don’t give it to ourselves naturally and how we can give ourselves the unconditional love and approval that we are looking for outside of ourselves.
Where did the Praise go?
Our default (as adults) is self-doubt. That’s tough to hear, I know, but so true. And, its really sad because as kids our parents praised us for the smallest things. Wiping your face as a toddler was greeted with applause! Putting your pants on by yourself was such an achievement! Then you get older and you’re expected to be able to do these and many, many other things competently by yourself. The praise wanes a little bit and before you know it you’re getting more of a ‘you can do better than that’ attitude. This hurts. And, our parents (and society in general) don’t mean any harm, they are just encouraging you to keep striving to improve on your own. But, we are still looking for that praise! Where did the adoration go?!
We have to learn to understand that no one is out to get us and that it’s all just sadly misguided good intentions. We get to that point in our lives when we need to start doing things for ourselves. We’re seen as ‘capable’. That’s when the expectations show up at our door. Like you’ve reached a certain age or stage in your development that you should be able to ‘do it all!’. But, it doesn’t work that way. For ANYONE! We grow and we learn. We trip up and we stumble. And, if we don’t wear self-doubt like a cloak around our shoulders, we figure out our strengths in life and run with it.
What has Self-Doubt gotten You?
Imagine waking up every day, knowing in your heart that you’ve got what it takes to take on the world. That’s ridiculous, you think, but what if we can believe in ourselves wholeheartedly? What if we are the only cheerleaders we will ever need? I guess the question is, what has doubting yourself gotten you? Do you know anyone who has achieved anything worth noting that goes around saying ‘I’m terrible at this and I keep getting everything wrong, why even bother.’? No!
Are there people who experience self-doubt and push through it anyway because deep down they believe in themselves so much that they are prepared to take those knocks because they know they are worth it? Yes! Can you spot a little trick there? Sometimes even the self-doubt is actually only surface level and at your core you believe in yourself. Truth: this is fear masking as doubt. Learn to spot it and you will know to keep going! This will empower you to know the truth; that you actually do believe in yourself, you’re just scared. And being scared is okay.
Less Approval Seeking
When you believe in yourself you stop looking around you for everyone else’s approval. Looking for approval outside of yourself is always an empty win, even when you get the approval! Why? Because you feel a little like a puppy waiting for a pat on the head. Don’t settle for a ‘good girl’ response when you can get a fist pump and a ‘nailed it’ from yourself. It feels so much sweeter!
Besides, when you realize that showing up for yourself continuously builds self confidence and helps you to believe in yourself even more you’ll keep wanting to get your own approval. You’ll start becoming your own cheerleader and egging yourself on to reach higher, do better. Best part, you get to be your own dopamine hit!
Stop focusing on Failures and Start Seeing the Wins
Imagine a scenario where you have absolute confidence in your abilities. No doubt, only faith. You know your worth, trust yourself not to fall short or let yourself down. Now, if there’s a little voice saying ‘that would be nice’ ask yourself why you don’t believe this can be your truth. Have you failed before? Have you let yourself down? Ok. Does that mean it absolutely has to have the same outcome again? Why on earth do we assume that one wrong step or even a failure automatically means we’re destined to fail again?
And, here’s the thing. Even failure isn’t ‘the end!’. We need to be able to learn from life’s experiences and we also need to learn to be resilient. These are strengths, not weaknesses. So, the way I see it we can focus on the failures and the upsets or we can focus on the growth and our wins in life. Even if the win (for the moment) is the lesson.
I hope this has helped you see yourself from a new perspective. To accept yourself more and to believe in yourself more, knowing that bumps on the road are normal. Be your own cheerleader and you’ll win every time.
If you enjoyed this blog, head over and check out this one: Secrets for How to Change your Mindset
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